Hey Element Church. I got back into town on Wednesday evening and have been busy getting prepared for Sunday. I was so humbled to be on the attack team for Connections in Boise. Honored that my friend would choose me to offer any kind of advice in church planting. Here are my final thoughts on the weekend. Stuff God taught me while we were teaching.
Billy from Soujourn Fellowship in Olathe, KS shared these things about balancing family and church and some general family issues. He asked his family some questions about ministry life and here are some of their responses. I think every pastors family faces some of this:
“What do you not like about being in a pastors family?” 1. Expectations of others. 2. Exclusion of others “Well you’re in a pastors family so you probably can’t do this. 3. Being on a pedestal and always in a glass house.
Billy talked about giving approval to his kids in front of other people and how much that means to them. He shared an illustration from Jesus’ baptism in a totally different take. Something I never thought of. When Jesus was baptized, the Father spoke from Heaven and said “This is my Son in whom I am well pleased!” Typically we think of that being said for the people who were there or for the reader. He brought up that if Jesus were, as we believe, FULLY human, he would have longed for His Father’s approval. For Jesus to hear His dad say “I am well pleased” was monumental to his humanness. I loved that. Billy said “If Jesus needed it, so do our kids.”
Things the family wished they’d do better: Say “No!” to things without having to have a reason. Just because.
He then shared some thoughts from Andy Stanley and things Andy shared about the pastors home.
The real reason Andy says he worked too much and was at home too little was “I was not sure God could be trusted to build as big a church as I wanted Him to build.” (WOW!)
“I’m willing for you to build as big a church as you can build in my 45 hours, and I will be satisfied with that. But I promise you, I’m not going to cheat my family.”
“I was commanded to love my wife. I was never commanded to build the church.” Jesus says that HE will build the church.
“My observation is that men and women who love the church and don’t love their family have neither great churches nor great families.” (BINGO)
“The Kingdom of God does not hinge on my ability to put more and more hours into it. You have graciously invited me to be a very, very tiny part of it. But at the end of the day, your will will be done, and the Church WILL be built.”
Speaking of family “Never violate the principles of God in order to gain or maintain the blessings of God.”
“The problem comes when we try to trade jobs with Jesus.”
Here are my thoughts on Andy’s thoughts cause I know some people will go to the extreme in their rebuttle of Him. I believe that many times, we as pastors forget that it is NOT because of our effort that the church works, it is because of the power of the Holy Spirit. With that said, I also believe in some sort of divine partnership that God wants me to give EVERYTHING that HE asks of me and not anyone else. I need to do that while not neglecting my personal relationship with Him first, my family second and myself third. Good stuff.
Little Duck Growing,
Jeff
